TIRA

I feel the smell of medicines, syringes, antiseptic floor cleaner and that god awful hospital gown that they give you for the last time as the doctor finally removes my IV insulin and puts a clean bandage on my hand. ‘You're good to go. I know how painful it has been for you but again you’ve been my favourite patient and I don't think i can actually say this but you truly have been the strongest one’ said Dr. Shah while giving me the warmest smile. I hugged him in return and I know that it might not be professional but I needed that and I know he won't mind as he is the one who has been treating me for the last 21 years. Wow , 21 years. I've spent my whole life fighting this disease. For once i thought it was gone but nope it didn’t happen. However, today is the last day of all these things and I'm finally free. I told my parents to meet me at the gate as for the last time I would like to thank all the staff that has been with me for the last 21 years. They honestly are like family to me as I've spent more birthdays here than at my own house. I said goodbye to all the staff and Rhea cried and then Mrs. Patty and then everybody including me. ‘They better be happy tears or i would be genuinely pissed’ i said while laughing. ‘They are. It’s just that we love you and we will  miss you but darling are you-’

‘Mrs. Patty everything will be fine, and i'm fine and you don't have to worry about me anymore and really glad that i have you in my life , all of you actually. Thank you for giving me peace and laughter and for making my 12th birthday iron-man themed and for all the love you've given me. I couldn't have done it without you. I Love you’

That was my goodbye to the staff and of course all of us cried again. I opened the door of my dads car and I sat in the back seat and before they could ask me anything I told them my farewell story of the hospital. My mom asked me if i want to spend the day as i asked them before and i said yes and then my dad asked me again if i was sure it i just want to go home and rest for a while.

‘I've been resting my whole life dad, please I'm tired of all the resting,’ I said.

‘Okay honey, I’m sorry,’ he replied.

Soon the car took a final turn and then stopped and I  finally felt like I'm living. The big wooden door along with the patio that looked like it was made of wood but when looked closely you will realise that it's not. I said bye to my parents and then told them I will be home before 11pm. I walked up the stairs to the wooden door and took a deep breath. I just couldn’t believe I was standing in front of ‘The literary lantern Bistro’. As someone who has spent most of her life watching dead poets' society and reading dark academia books, this place was perfect. ‘The literary lantern’ was a dark academia themed cafe which had two sections. One section was there in which they had all the old movie CDs and the other one was the books section. The book section had all kinds of books, from classics like Kafka, Dostoevsky to all the modern authors. 

I opened the door and stood there for a second to let all the overwhelmedness I'm feeling sink in and  then walked up straight to the books section and took a seat and as soon as the waiter arrived I ordered the one thing that I always wanted to have in this particular place.

‘I would like to order “oh captain, my captain combo”. 

‘Sure, anything else?’

‘No, thankyou’.

I will never forget this moment. I love my life.

I finally love my life.

RIVAAN 

I'm finally done with college and I was called here in ‘the literary lantern’ to ‘learn and understand’ how the food business works. ‘It is quite ironic that when I was told to arrive on time , the person who told me cancelled and told me an hour later. I feel like he must've been a jerk’.

‘That ‘jerk’ is your father Rivaan and it will not do any harm to you to call him dad for once.’ 

‘You know i've always called you pappy but i think now i should call you grumpy grandpa, no i have a better one, ‘THE OLD MAN’ i said to my ‘pappy’ while taking the cigar out of his hand and putting in my mouth. 

Pappy sighed and leaned from at the table from behind that counter and said ‘It's not funny and he loves you just as much as I do and just as much as your mother did’.

My mother did! But she can’t anymore and I don't have her anymore and I never will and it's all because of him. 

I could feel a tight knot in my throat and stinging tears in my eyes and I could do just one thing that I always do, I put my hand in my jacket’s pocket and closed my fist as tightly as I could. 

I finally looked up and gave a wry smile to Pappy and told him that sometimes it feels like you are his dad and not my mother’s. 

‘I know that you pick up this mocking expression when you are hurt and i know you are but you are grown up now and you cannot hold a forever grudge against your father’

‘Watch me Pappy’.

‘You know i'm not here for long to watch you, i'm already 60  and i would very much like it if you just talk to him’.  

Before I could say anything to him cut and continued what he was saying.

‘ You think that your father didn't love your mother but that is stupid, it wasn't his fault. The accident wasn’t his fault and you can pretend to not to believe it but deep down you know that he loved your mother more than anything and since then he is trying his best to connect with you’

‘and that must be why he cancelled on me again?’ I shrugged him off.

‘Okay, let's drop this for now on’ said grandpa.

‘I think we should but pappy let's not be in this serious uncomfortable awkward phase and to get past this i have a great pla-’

‘No, you are not smoking my cigar but you can have a drink since you are graduate now’ said pappy and then he went behind the counter to make me a negroni. This has been an official drink all the ‘Awasthi’  men have had after their graduation. The drink was good and it's not like i haven't had a negroni before, it's just that my family doesnt know that i have it yet and it was like a ritual and  i didn't want to disappoint pappy and so drank it and gave him the most realistic expression i could. Pappy and I kept on squabbling.

I was spinning on the revolving chair looking at the negroni that I couldn't seem to finish when I saw her. I dont for just how long i  kept looking at her  but i knew it was long, as she was ordering food before and now her ‘oh captain, my captain’ meal has arrived.

‘ Love her yet?’ Pappy teased with a grin.

‘Uh- wha-. No, she was just-, i was just-, Wait! And stop with that smile Pappy, I was just looking in a direction and she is pretty and I looked at her just for a second okay?’

‘Just for a sec huh, son, it's been fifteen minutes and I know you would know that as her order has arrived. Go talk to her or you can wait for her to catch you staring’. Pappy teased AGAIN!

I told him I will do whatever I want and that he doesn't tell me what I should do and then  shamelessly  I got up from my chair and walked into her direction.

I have been with girls before, I have been with many girls before actually. That is one of the perks you have when you are rich and decent looking and when you start to hit the gym at the age of 16.

But this time, it was different and it was not like that i fell in love at first sight or anything like that, it was the attraction that she had. She was beautiful like BEAUTIFUL beautiful, not pretty beautiful.  She was wearing a black turtleneck with blue denims and a brown jacket. Her hair was open and a claw clip was hung on the edge of the jacket.

I walked towards here and then her gaze fell upon me and i said 

‘Hi’.

RIVAAN

 Okay, to be honest it wasn’t just a hi and it was more like

‘Hi’

Then she looked up at me and the hi turned into

‘Hi , um, how was your meal? I’m the owner of the place. I just wanted to know if you need anything else.’

‘The meal is great, thanks for asking,’ she replied and then went to read her book.

I was just standing there like a statue and when she looked up at me again all i could say was ‘reading white nights? Dostosveysky was a great person’

‘Well, that’s debatable’ she said while closing her book and giving me a chance to have a conversation with her.

‘Care to explain?’ I said.

‘Sure, have a seat’.

I listened to all of her explanations which I already knew but her interpretations made it more coherent and we finally concluded  that Dostosveysky was a great writer but as a person , well in her words, it was debatable. 

‘Well, that was fun, so which author do you think is  a great writer and also a great human being?’ I asked her.

‘Don't you have to work now? You have a whole cafe to run’. She replied .

I swear to god reading her was not easy and this was definitely not the answer i had expected. Before I could say anything I noticed a bandage on her hand. I was certain that she saw me as she hid her  hands under the table.

‘You should go, the meal was great and the place is amazing. Sorry for holding you back from your busy schedule.’

I didn’t realise how stupid i will sound when i said ‘ i don't have a busy schedule’

‘ You said you run this place, how can you not be busy?’

‘ I don't run this place, my father does.’

‘So your father owns the place and you said you did, huh, i guess all the rich are alike’

‘Wha- , uh no, no you don't understand. I graduated recently and my father wants me to learn the family business, so I thought I should interact with customers to know their needs and assist them.’

‘Seems like you interacted with only one customer’

‘Seems like you are the special one’

‘Seems like you are flirting with me’

‘Seems like you are right’ .

And there it was, her smile. The most beautiful smile. She tried her best to hide it but failed.

Seems like I'm making some progress.

TIRA

‘Seems like you are right’ he said.

I have no idea what this sentence did to me but I blushed and smiled like an idiot and I could see that he was enjoying it. He was devilishly handsome, he wasn't smart, he was HANDSOME.. He looked like  a prince in the white shirt but his  leather jacket contradicted his resemblance and made him look like a mafia.   When he first came and asked me about my meal I thought it was just hospitality but now I think it is something else and before it becomes something, I have to put an end to it, but I really don't want to. 

‘Listen, i think you should go now and ‘interact’ with other customers’. I said.

‘I'm already interacting with our best customer’. He replied.

‘Okay fine, what do you want?’ I said as I just couldn’t let this play go on. 

‘Your name please, and it would be really great if you can give me your phone number as well. He said while winking at me.

‘My name is Tira and i will not give you my phone number and i think you should leave’

‘Hello Tira, it was a pleasure to meet you. My name is Rivaan and please don't ask me to leave yet’. Before I could say anything he continued.

‘I'm not here asking you on a date , I just want to talk to you and if you are going to ask if I have done this before then no I haven't but that doesn't mean that i don't go out on dates. Girls ask me out so technically i haven't asked anyone out so that means i didn't lie before. If you are gonna say that we don't know each other then i have an answer for that as well. I know you enough to take you out for a coffee, just as friends if you want. I know your name is Tira, you love dead poets society cause you ordered my captain meal and i also know that you have a bandage on your hand which means you probably scratched your hand while opening that wooden door or maybe doing something else and i also know that i have never talked for so long in my entire life, so please just give a chance, i will take you to the places you have never seen.’

‘I have that bandage from an IV drip that i had for twenty one years and yes im twenty one years, so pretty much my whole life and today i finally removed it, so your bandage bid was wrong Rivaan and i guess that means you did not know me enough to ‘take me out as a friend’. ’ I replied. 

He bowed his head and got up and said that he is sorry, that he crossed a line and will not bother me again and  that I can take any book I want and specifically mentioned that it's not a kind of bribe or anything like that, just that he wanted to do that for me.

 I knew he was deeply sorry and to be honest it was not his mistake. He just wanted to take a girl out and maybe it is normal, not maybe it is normal. It's just that it isn't normal in my life but that doesnt mean I can't pretend it is. Just for one day. Just for today.

So when he turned and was about to leave i said,

‘Can you really take me to the places i have never seen?’

He turned and gave me a soft smile and sat on the chair again and said ‘You don't have to do that. I acted like a jerk and I should've respected your space and shouldn't have bothered you and I'm really sorry for what I did, truly Iam’.

‘That is not what I asked, I asked if you can really take me to the places i have never seen and i'm not doing it for any other reason believe it or not’ i said while directly looking at him. It was the first time I looked into his eyes. They were black but they were different. It was not the kind of black that scares you or the black that you want to escape,it was the kind of black that consumes you, that gives you power, the black that drowns you and saves you at the same time. 

He looked at me intently and smiled and said ‘I can and I would love to’.